Big-boy President Trump needs his twice-daily secret folder of flattery

Donald Trump

Let’s play White House Palace Intrigue: What’s In The Secret Folder Edition:

Twice a day since the beginning of the Trump administration, a special folder is prepared for the president. The first document is prepared around 9:30 a.m. and the follow-up, around 4:30 p.m. Former Chief of Staff Reince Priebus and former Press Secretary Sean Spicer both wanted the privilege of delivering the 20-to-25-page packet to President Trump personally, White House sources say.

Oh, my. What could it be? Top-secret intelligence? Updates on legislative initiatives?

These sensitive papers, described to VICE News by three current and former White House officials, don’t contain top-secret intelligence or updates on legislative initiatives.

Dang. It must be something even more important and riveting than I can imagine. Let’s hear it:

Instead, the folders are filled with screenshots of positive cable news chyrons (those lower-third headlines and crawls), admiring tweets, transcripts of fawning TV interviews, praise-filled news stories, and sometimes just pictures of Trump on TV looking powerful.

One White House official said the only feedback the White House communications shop, which prepares the folder, has ever gotten in all these months is: “It needs to be more fucking positive.” That’s why some in the White House ruefully refer to the packet as “the propaganda document.”

Twice a day, every day, hand-picked assistants and representatives of the most powerful man in the world scuffle at the door to bring their boss, noted leader of the free world, his special dose of back-pats telling him what a big, strong, smart boy he is and that everyone loves him.

And this is the man who’s tweeting himself into a nuclear pissing contest with North Korea.

Forget America – we’re all fucked.

(via @Popehat)